Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize