Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
