i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
