the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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