That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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