She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize