dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
