If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
