did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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