i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
