i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
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