I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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