Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
