Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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