one two three fourrrrnication!
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
