Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
