its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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