yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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