if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
