it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
