So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
why is half of my head shaved?
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