Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
