i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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