Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Randomize
