What did we do last night that was yellow?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
