Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize