she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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