at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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