I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
