I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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