you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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