Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
