We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
