spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I need water and some morals
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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