I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
