normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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