talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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