This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize