Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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