Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
