I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
