he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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