Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize