Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
we have officially lost it.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
