I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize