Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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