I'll bet she douches with gravy.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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