remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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