apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
