More tranny stories later!
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize